Turning Your Grumbling into Gratitude

If I were to describe the posture of my heart during our homeschooling journey with one word, I wish I could say it was joyful. Or perhaps peaceful, patient, or grateful. But if I am being truthful, one word that would often describe me is grumbling.

I grumbled about the mess. I complained about the interruptions. I grow weary of teaching the same lesson over and over again. I felt frustrated when our carefully laid plans unraveled before lunch, when attitudes were difficult, or when I wondered if we were accomplishing anything at all. I love my children. I believe deeply in homeschooling. I am convinced that educating them at home is a good and worthy calling. And yet, somewhere along the way, I had allowed something beautiful to become something burdensome.

I had forgotten to give thanks.

In Luke 17, we encounter ten men suffering from leprosy. Their condition had separated them from their families, their communities, and the ordinary rhythms of life. When they saw Jesus, they cried out for mercy. And Jesus healed them. Imagine what that meant. They could return home. They could embrace their families. They could participate in the ordinary joys of life that had been taken from them. All ten received this extraordinary gift. But only one returned to Jesus. Luke tells us that when he realized he had been healed, he turned back, praising God, and fell at Jesus' feet in thanksgiving.  Jesus asked, "Were not ten cleansed? Where are the nine?"  That question has stayed with me because I wonder how often I have been among the nine.

How often do I receive gifts from the Lord, only to become so consumed with the responsibilities that may accompany them that I forget to return to Him in thanksgiving?

Homeschooling is a remarkable privilege.  We have the opportunity to spend our days alongside our children, to witness their discoveries, to cultivate their affections, and to introduce them to the beautiful and wonderful world God has made. We get to read good books together. We get to watch ideas take root. We get to witness the slow, (sometimes) imperceptible work of growth.

But we also get the laundry.
And the dishes.
And the child who cannot remember the math concept we explained seventeen times.
And the sibling disagreements... sooo many sibling disagreements,
the unfinished assignments, the interruptions, and the nagging suspicion that everyone else's homeschool is somehow running more smoothly than ours.

Somewhere between the privilege and the responsibility, I can find myself paying more attention to what homeschooling demands of me than to what God has entrusted to me. My circumstances may not necessarily change, but my posture does. I can become more preoccupied with the difficulties of the gift than with the goodness of the Giver.  And grumbling can slowly become a habit. (Ingratitude is a slippery slope!)

One of the things that strikes me most about the story in Luke 17 is that all ten men experienced healing, but only one returned to the Healer. The nine received something wonderful, yes, but the one who returned recognized Someone wonderful. The greatest gift I have received is not the opportunity to homeschool my children. It is the grace of Jesus Christ, who has brought me near to God. And that grace changes everything.

Tim Keller once said, "Gratitude is what you feel. Thanksgiving is what you do."
The Samaritan didn't simply feel grateful for his healing. He turned around, fell at the feet of Jesus, and gave thanks. And perhaps that is the invitation for us as homeschooling parents - not to wait until the lessons are finished, the house is clean, or the days become easier, but to recognize the Giver in the midst of it all day after day. So, mom and dad, for what can you be grateful today, and how will you give thanks?